THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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