now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Randomize
