I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
