i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
