Pregnant stripper...not hot.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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