Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Randomize