Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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