so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
