I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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