he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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