girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
