Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Randomize
