porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
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