your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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