omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Randomize
