I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Randomize
