Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
