I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize
