Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize