haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
