hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
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