is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Randomize
