Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
