I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
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