she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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