I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
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