Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
