Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Randomize
