Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
