I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
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