I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Randomize
