Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
