gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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