At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
