wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize
