tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
3pm strippers are depressing
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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