There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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