You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
