found the other keg... it's in the tree
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
