So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Randomize
