where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
No subtext here. People are naked.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I think a kid would responsible me up
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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