Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
