sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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