It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
