i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
i came on her dog
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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