when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
your room smells of hookers.
And success
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
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