I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
