i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
