I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
