his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
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